I’ve been single for a while now, nope, don’t get your tunes of sorrow out for me just yet for there is no need. Dating myself has, in fact, been an awakening experience and it is just what I needed.
Now, if you'd asked me when I was newly single I would’ve told you to ‘eff off’ for my ego needed/wanted to be with someone. There’s an old saying, ‘don’t shit on your own doorstep’, well, I totally ignored that and 'shat' so badly on mine I had to learn a lesson as a result. It sucked for a long time!
‘Cheers Universe, I heard you, I listened!’ I’ve been single ever since - HAHAHA
So what have I learned during my time of single-hoodship?
1. I actually needed to be single.
It is so easy for us to jump into a relationship after splitting. It’s a nice distraction & if it is meant to be, then lucky you. If you’re like me. You probably need some time to heal, to lick the wounds of your ego, reconnect and figure out what the hell to do with your life?! Asking big questions like ‘who am I…? What is it all about…? Is this all that there is....?’ LOL eeeesh so cliche but so true. Love it.
2. Time + Positive Action = Positive Change & Healing
When I first broke up from my ex, I was pretty heart-broken I won’t lie and for a long time I searched for something, seeking it out in all the wrong places, mainly through drugs, alcohol, and parties. Being in a relationship actually kept my addictive behaviour hidden. Now it was free to gan raaaaaaaaaadge. And it did. For about a year, maybe longer, right up until I decided I’d had enough, I carried on repeating the same patterns of behaviour, not really looking at myself and understanding what needed to be healed. I’ve done that now and I am here to lead others to do the same. Who’s with me?!
Thinking, acting, and behaving the same is not going to help you unless you’re a glutton for wanting to learn the same lessons over and over. Which is perfectly fine if that is what your soul needs and wants. For me, I was knackered and something had to change.
3. I know what I like and what I don’t like
When we are in relationships we can settle, we can settle for things that actually cause us and our own journey a disservice. I did that out of fear. Fear of not being good enough. Fear of being rejected, fear of being seen, fear of being alone. There was a lot of fear. Don’t get me wrong, I ain’t no angel and I’ve made plenty of mistakes, I’ve said things I shouldn’t, and I’ve acted in ways that weren’t cool but at the same time, I am now aware that these were the actions of someone who was deeply unhappy with themselves and accepted